


Se la vita ti dà limoni, tu devi limonare

by xenolinguist



Category: Eurovision Song Contest RPF, Festival di Sanremo RPF
Genre: Basically the story of how one visit at Lush got Ermal a boyfriend, Bisexual Disaster Ermal, Bisexual Disaster Fabrizio, Fab has the patience of a thousand saints, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Humor, M/M, University AU, group chat shenanigans, student dorm au, yeah lbr they are both bi disasters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 08:05:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18384353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xenolinguist/pseuds/xenolinguist
Summary: Life in the student dorm is certainly a whole new experience for the young Ermal but soon he got accustomed to the new circumstances, the new friends, his new room mate....  It was a new, but exciting experience to share your roof with a dozen other students, but that changes one day when one of Ermal's beloved possessions goes missing.....





	Se la vita ti dà limoni, tu devi limonare

The streets of Milan being filled with most curious shops was a well-known fact, but being there and experiencing it himself was an entirely different feeling all together. The lights and the shopping windows, the decoration and the variety - Ermal's eyes wanted to be everywhere at once but simultaneously observe every single detail of each window. It's been half a year now since the young student had moved from the deep South up to the Northern metropolis and frankly, there hadn't been many opportunities to discover the gems of the city yet. Too often had long study sessions paired with phonology books or literature presentations chained him to the dorm, but today Ermal had a bit of time to breath and for once, he decided to make a stroll through the city. While one fancy fashion boutique after another crossed his path, it was however a completely different store that Ermal felt drawn to. Was it the wonderful smell? Was it the bright colours? Maybe a bit of both, but Ermal felt himself enter the little store. What awaited him inside were dozens of small bottles, cremes, soaps in every possible smell and colour. Nevertheless one particular item lured him like no other.

On the shelf to his left, between the watermelon mists and galactic bath bombs, a bright yellow piece of soap stood. It was so elegant; the brand’s name finely carved into the top side with detailed ornaments in the corners and all wrapped with a silky mint green bow. He picked the soap up, smelled it and it almost blew him away. It was as if you drowned in an endless shower of lemons, the smell so strong and rich, and yet it wasn't that hideous artificial lemon smell you'd usually find. No, this one smelled like the real fruit.  
Ermal inhaled in more time and almost felt lightheaded. He really wanted it, yet when he saw the price tag he stopped in his tracks.  
35 Euro were…. not nothing. Immediately his mind started comparing and calculating: for that money he could have lunch at the cafeteria seven times or buy those books he'd have to read this semester or at least one new pair of shoes, he'd need those really bad as well. Chewing on his lip he contemplated and contemplated. Maybe he could find those books as pdf online, and maybe his current shoes could endure until next month…. Before that new found motivation left him, he quickly put his plan in motion and soon left. 35€ poorer, but one little satisfaction richer. 

On the way back, he shortly stopped by the supermarket as well, buying a few groceries for the following days, and maybe he did pay attention to get the cheaper items this time.  
Soon he ended up at the student dorm that has become his new home in the past six months. Strange, he mused as he pushed the button in the elevator, how on one hand he still considered Bari his home, and yet on the other hand, he felt a real connection with Milan growing. How used he got to this dorm that even before he heard the elevator’s bing sound, he lifted his head knowing exactly when he’d reach the 4th floor. And even if the entire floor shared the kitchen, it just suited him well because Ermal soon realised it was more than just a place to prepare food. As he entered the kitchen to put his groceries away he found himself alone, but that was rather an exception. Sometimes Roberto would be sitting there doing his homework, Dino and Claudio would sit together and play cards, Andrea would take care of the dozen plants he felt the urge to place on every empty surface and of course sometimes Ermal would run into Fabrizio mid-cooking who’d always ask to join him.  
Huh, Fabrizio… 

Ermal couldn’t suppress a grin at the thought of his room mate. When he moved in, he really had no idea how it would be to share a living space with a complete stranger. A certain uneasiness accompanied him in the first few days before Fabrizio moved in, the fear of what kind of madman he’d have to share a room with constantly playing in his head. Nevertheless, once the day came and the young Roman introduced himself to Ermal, he found all of his worries unjustified. Fabrizio was not a bad room mate. Fabrizio was not a bad anything at all. Perhaps a bit shy and withdrawn at first sight, but once you got to know him you realised he’s kind hearted, considerate, unconventional, good-natured, thoughtful, brilliant… gorgeous, beautiful.…  
“F-Fuck!”  
If the box of noodles he tried to put on the cupboard almost slipped out of his hands then this was in no way related to the last thing that crossed his mind and was absolutely related to his natural clumsiness. Yes, exactly. Also, it was a terribly warm day and with the heating running it was just natural for a little flush to form on his face. 

But before he could continue to put the rest of the groceries away, his phone started ringing with the sound of a violin signifying that only one person could be calling him. He sighed, knowing a long phone call was ahead, before picking up. “Ciao Mamma..”  
Since moving out, his mother has had a hard time seeing her oldest go, especially in such a big ‘dangerous’ city like Milan so the phone calls became more frequent and much longer. And as his mother was telling him about Sabina’s latest English assignment and the new dog their neighbours got and what she has been up to lately, Ermal started pacing. He eventually left the kitchen, took a walk around the corridors, even waltzed to the floor below them as he hummed approvingly to whatever his mother was telling him. After full 42min. they finally hung up and Ermal slowly returned to his own floor and his abandoned groceries, those eggs and milk wouldn’t put themselves into the fridge after all. 

And indeed, he swiftly put everything where it belonged except of- except of- where did he put it again? He turned around several times, inspected the tables, under the tables, the chairs, all cupboards, the shopping bag…..And yet, nothing. Absolutely nothing.  
His beloved and, if he may add damn expensive, soap he had _just_ bought has vanished in thin air. No, not vanished - _stolen!_ It had just been mercilessly taken from him in the most insidious way when he had been gone. Unbelievable, absolutely unbelievable. And to think that he considered ANY of them his friends…. and this is how they repay him?! By betraying him! These ferocious heathens!

With anger pulsing through his veins, Ermal took out his phone and opened Whatsapp. At first he hadn’t been sure if creating a groupchat for the entire floor was a good idea, but oh, how handy it came now.

 

13:24 Ermal @ [omg theyr dormmates]: _Listen, I cannot even fathom who of you uncultured, disrespectful swines had the nerve to just confiscate, no, STEAL, other people's property as if you were raised in a fucking barn, but when I find out I'll personally smack a fucking pot against your head and then take your own soap too. Eye for an eye after all. How even dare you?! Am I stealing anyone's things?! Have I ever taken your spaghetti or flour?! No, I fucking didn't cuz I have manners and a sense of what is right in contrary to you little shits. And how quickly you did it ?! I had only a phone call?! Were u waiting for me to get out so you could steal my beautiful soap, you filthy thief?! To think that I probably called that wicked who did it a friend of mine repulses me beyond measure! Anyway, once I find out who it is, you'll regret the the day you were conceived mark my words, fuckers 🖕_

 

Ermal threw the phone on the counter and huffed. That had felt good. Letting some steam off, letting his thoughts run freely. Had the wording been a bit too strong? Well, who cares, this is what he felt like so let them better know. Speaking of them… there was no sign of a message so nobody had reacted yet. Ermal checked just once more to be sure and realised there might be another reason why nobody was able to respond to him immediately. 

13:28 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: wh-  
13:30 Marco @ [omg theyr dormmates]:ermal u ok 😶  
13:31 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: yall hear sum?  
13:31 Fabrizio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: wait this isn't Italian 😳  
13:32 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: hey can someone translate ?????

Okay………...so he perhaps has this tiny little tendency to slip into Albanian when he’s particularly angry. That…. It has been known to happen at times, yes. But he just got carried away in the the heat of the moment, dammit, let them figure it out by themselves, he ain’t translating for these criminals!

And indeed, his wishes were fulfilled shortly after. 

 

13:35 Dino @ [omg theyr dormmates]: Ermal....🤦 {screenshot_google_translate.jpg}  
13:35 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: LMAOO  
13:35 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: did u just threatened us because of a fucking _soap_  
13:37 Roberto @ [omg theyr dormmates]: hey guys 🤙🤙 what did I miss  
13:37 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: Meta is going amok cuz princess misplaced his perfumed soap 💁  
13:38 Roberto @ [omg theyr dormmates]: what??  
13:38 Marco @ [omg theyr dormmates]: smh 🤦🙄  
13:40 Ermal @ [omg theyr dormmates]: STPO PLYAING DUMB ALRESDY WHO TOOK IT !!!!!???!?? 😠😠😠  
13:41 Fabrizio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: hey erm maybe u should come back to our room to calm down a bit ?  
13:42Ermal @ [omg theyr dormmates]: NO  
13:42 Fabrizio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: ermal....  
13:43Ermal @ [omg theyr dormmates]: I shall now barricade the kitchen until justice is served!!!!!

Oh no, oh no, no, no! He certainly wouldn’t give up without a fight. That’s not how he is, has never been how he is. If they’re playing dumb, then so be it. They can kiss the stove goodbye, he won’t let them near the microwave. If he has to, he’ll throw all the pots out of the window too. But one thing is sure, he will not let them win!

* * *

  
How one person could house such quantities of stubborness was beyond Fabrizio’s comprehension, but then again there was rarely anything that didn’t surprise him about Ermal Meta. He contemplated DM’ing Ermal but then a notification popped up on his screen.

13:44 Claudio @ Fabrizio: pls go collect ur boyfriend. my gf is coming over for a movie night later and I'd actually like to be able to make popcorn in the kitchen  
13:44 Fabrizio @ Claudio: k don't worry i'll talk to him  
13:46 Fabrizio @ Claudio: also stop calling him my bf  
13:46 Claudio @ Fabrizio: PFFFFFF nope

He shook his head at Claudio’s last message. Why their friends assumed such things Fabrizio didn't know, because things between him and Ermal definitely weren’t like _that._ Ermal _wasn’t_ his boyfriend! …....Not that Ermal would make a bad boyfriend and Fabrizio didn’t want him. God, Ermal would probably be a wonderful boyfriend who’d share his dish with you and feed you with his fork and make you laugh and kiss you under the starry night sky and-- and who currently declared the communal kitchen his fortress in his manic quest for retaliation like the madman he was. 

Fabrizio sighed deeply. Nothing would ever be simple or boring with the impossible riddle that was Ermal Meta. But lucky for him, Fabrizio was rather fond of riddles.

 

* * *

  


Fabrizio carefully opened the kitchen’s door, hoping he wouldn’t walk into a war zone and thank God, all appliances as well as the furniture were indeed still in one piece. There was only Ermal running up and down fuming, mumbling angrily to himself.  
He stopped however at the sound of the intrusion and snapped his head towards his room mate and before Fabrizio even had a chance to open his mouth, Ermal immediately declared.  
"I will not calm down!"  
"Ermal" The Roman couldn’t hide the tiredness in his voice, but his counterpart9 wouldn’t have any of it.  
"No, Fabrizio! I fucking won’t!! Just for once- for _once_ I wanted to have something nice and then-"  
"I know."

That made Ermal stop for moment. Fabrizio almost sounded ….sincere? He frowned, but Fabrizio didn’t get discouraged by that attitude and slowly approached him. He locked eyes with Ermal and just above a whisper he reassured him.

"Hey, I also have two siblings back home and rents here in Milan aren't exactly cheap. And with all the books we need, and all the other everyday stuff….” The older boy huffed and for split second he glanced down at himself. At the Metallica shirt he’d have forever, which he dearly loved but was long overdue to change. “Yeah, you gotta gauge the necessity of every purchase. And that one time you do actually indulge in something for your own pleasure, it almost makes you feel guilty.”

When he raised his head again, he was met with the sight of a calmer Ermal, eyes blown, mouthing quietly “Yes, exactly” as if in disbelief.

“I get it. I get _you,_ I really do, Ermal." 

And Ermal believed him. He didn’t sound pitiful, no, Fabrizio's words came from a place of genuine mutual understanding. Something so rare, but so valuable. 

"That's why I'm asking you to come with me."  
"But-"  
"Please, Ermal. Let's just go to our room"  
Fabrizio gently took his wrist and surprisingly, Ermal let him lead them back to their room. Once there, Ermal sat on his bed, instinctively hugging his fuzzy yellow pillow while Fabrizio vanished to the bathroom.  
Moments later he came back and Ermal's eyes widened when he saw the little yellow object in his hand. But-- Not Fabrizio? Not him? That couldn’t be!  
Sensing the shock coming from his friend, Fabrizio quickly answered before he got the wrong impression.

"I was putting away the cups I had in my room and saw the soap. But you were nowhere in sight. So I took it back to our room. I shouldn't have touched it, I'm sorry I upset you, I just wanted to keep it safe" The older boy muttered bashfully as he softly placed the soap into Ermal's hands who blinked a few times in confusion.  
"But...how did you know it's mine?" 

Now it was Fabrizio’s turn to blink.  
"Isn't that obvious? You always drink Schweppes and say how much you like lemon cookies and at the ice cream parlour you always order lemon ice cream? Like you reaaally have a thing for yellow in general, to be honest." He chuckled as he was eyeing the yellow pillow in Ermal’s lap, the yellow jacket hanging at the door or the yellow journal lying next to Ermal’s bed. 

"You ...you noticed that?" Ermal’s anger was long gone by now and a rather sweet emotion sneaked into his heart instead. Perhaps even one or two, or a few dozen butterflies accidentally ended up in his stomach as well.

Fabrizio rubbed the back of his head, suddenly very unsure of himself. "Yes? I-- please don't think I’m being creepy it's just that, I don't know, I noticed it when you talk about it? Not that I’m, like, keeping a written track record of everything you say, no, that would be ridiculous, right? I just, I happened to remember these details, not that they’re super weird and that’s why I remember them, that’s not what I was tr-"

"It's not creepy!” Ermal laughed out loud, effectively cutting off his counterpart’s spiral of endless explanations. “It's...it's sweet... _you're_ sweet." He really really was, Ermal realised. And Fabrizio became even sweeter when he blushed so nicely under his collar. There was a certain delicate tension in the room as they kept grinning at each other. Neither of them quite sure what was happening but also not wanting to stop whatever it was. That spell however was finally broken by the buzzing of their phones, and they both had to finally tore their eyes from each other to check their notifications.

 

14:17 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: hey anyone kno if meta is still taking the kitchen hostage im afraid to check  
14:18 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: nah he out i just went and there's no sign of him  
14:19 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: OH THANK GOD 🙌🏻 thx fab u a king  
14:20 Marco @ [omg theyr dormmates]: Fab? 👀  
14:20 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: 👀  
14:20 Roberto @ [omg theyr dormmates]: 👀  
14:21 Dino @ [omg theyr dormmates]: probs lured him out by the promise of some sweet alone time 😙😙  
14:23 Marco @ [omg theyr dormmates]: u notice how they're both silent? Probably snogging rn as we speak  
14:25 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: boifrend goals amirite ladies 😩💯  
14:25 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: tea 😩

 

Unbeknownst to the chat, the two did in fact read along and both of them felt a sudden hot blush creeping on their faces.  
Almost instantly, that delicate tension turned into a tangible awkwardness lingering between them.  
Fabrizio coughed and leaned against the desk as nonchalantly as he possibly could. Those little sticky notes attached to the desk telling him to buy milk and call his mother suddenly seemed way more fascinating than facing Ermal.  
"Funny...our friends, they’re, uhm, funny. Right?"  
"Heh, yeah, they're- they're stupid" Ermal felt suddenly very trapped on the bed. He put the soap and pillow beside him and he got up, aimlessly roaming around the room just to keep himself busy until he eventually reached the bookshelf, restlessly picking up a random book he had no intention to actually read. Nevertheless, it was easier looking at the printed words that made no sense to him, than looking back at the boy across the room.

"I'm sorry they keep saying…. all that kinda stuff, y’know, I can imagine it's really annoying for a straight guy to hear such ...jokes all the time. So please just igno-"  
"Wait, what did you just say?" Fabrizio interrupted his apology frowning in an almost vexed way.  
"I- I...said ...it's annoying for you to hear that stuff, for sure." Ermal muttered uncertain, not quite understanding where he had gone wrong with that statement but Fabrizio simply shook his head.  
"No, you said- you said 'it’s annoying for a _straight_ guy'. You- you think I'm straight?!"  
He lifted his gaze at last and short silence set in while Ermal replayed the words he just heard in his head. And as the book hit the ground, so did the realisation hit the man who had held it. 

"WAIT YOU AREN'T?!" 

Now that outburst made Fabrizio jump in return whose eyes betrayed a kind of panic lurking inside them.  
"Ehhh not- not strictly?" Why was his throat so dry all of the sudden?! "I mean, y’know, why would I limit myself to one group of people for all my life, seems ridiculous to me to restrict oneself like this." Fabrizio felt hot under Ermal's eyes silently staring at him. Great, wonderful. Why could he never shut up? Why did he have to correct Ermal?! And now look at this mess! He should have never said a word, that's exactly why he hadn’t said anything in all these months to begin with.  
"B-But don't get uncomfortable, please, it's no big deal I'm sure we can just continue as befo-"  
"Why would I get uncomfortable?"

Fabrizio blinked. That’s… not the follow up reaction he expected.  
"Because that's....that's what straight guys usually do? Especially when they're supposed to share a living space with someone who isn't straight. So that's why I'm telling you, you don't have to be afraid that I'll hit on you or anything, it's gonna be al-"  
"What if ...what if I.." Ermal swallowed and looked out of the window, trying to suppress his heartbeat drumming wildly in his ears and the sneaky voice of anxiety yelling at him to abort mission. "What if I don't mind you hitting on me."  
Fabrizio thought he'd hear the words correctly but he surely had to have misheard. But Ermal, despite the blush and the nerves, knew he had to continue now. He had never been a coward and he couldn’t start being one now. 

"What if I ... I'd...like you to hit on me. Or maybe even _want_ you to hit on me. Is that- would that bother you, Fabrizio?" He asked so tenderly, as if he was already preparing for the harsh punch of rejection but all he registered was Fabrizio’s breath hitching.  
"Ermal...." He slowly stepped closer to his roommate "Ermal, I, God, Ermal, I wanted to, I wanted to- to make a move for months. God, I was just so scared, so scared I'd creep you out when in fact you ..." Instead of fear and anxiety, they stared at each other in something akin to awe now and slowly a disbelieving but happy smile appeared on Ermal's face  
"Really? For _months?"_  
Fabrizio let his head hang, hiding a little smile of his own  
"Remember when we tried to bake? And set off the fire alarm?"  
"God, how could I forget"  
"After the firefighters scolded us, and we just leaned against the wall, laughing, you still had a bit of dough on your face and flour in your hair but the brightest smile nevertheless and I just--" Fabrizio bit his lip happily reliving the memory "I just felt myself falling for you so hard in the moment. I wanted to kiss you so bad back then." 

He heard Ermal gasp before whispering  
"Do you still want to kiss me, Fabri?"

Fabrizio looked up to see Ermal slowly crossing the room and the question was a mere formality, Fabrizio realised that when he saw the look in Ermal's eyes. He knew what would happen next. And indeed mere moments later, Fabrizio felt two delicate hands tentatively touch his neck, caressing his jawline, pulling him closer a pair of chapped lips met his own in a long overdue kiss. 

And kissed him again, and again while Fabrizio experimentally rested his own hands on Ermal’s lower back, pulling him closer. Pulling him into another kiss until they both broke it off because started giggling for no reason at all. And Fabrizio wasn’t sure if his face would start to hurt from all the smiling but how could he not when Ermal was nuzzling his cheeks, when he felt the vibrations of him laughing against his lips.  
So they continued like that, many short and sweet kisses turning soon into deep and long kisses. As Ermal pushed Fabrizio back against the desk, Fabrizio's hands eventually found their way under Ermal's shirt while the younger’s boy’s tongue slid into his mouth causing Fabrizio to make sounds Ermal could ba-

 

**KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.**

"Hey, Ermal, can I borrow your electric kettle? Mine broke." Vige asked through the door and Ermal let out an almost feral groan. 

"FUCK OFF VIGE WE'RE MAKING OUT" he angrily yelled back to Fabrizio’s amusement, but the older boy’s chuckles soon turned into quite some other sounds when Ermal started kissing his neck. Not that Ermal himself stayed silent much either. No, by the sounds of it all they were just getting started, Andrea realised from the other side of the door. And so the young student made his way back to his own room, holding the now redundant mug. He might not have been able to make himself a cup of peppermint tea, but therefore he got a whole other kind of tea instead. 

 

15:42 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: omfg u guys... 👀👀They Did It™  
15:43 Roberto @ [omg theyr dormmates]:who?? Did what ???  
15:43 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: Ermal and Fabrizio 👀👀 each other 👀👀  
15:47 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: theyre gonna murder us when they come back here but... yeah we been knew they’re everyones fave gay couple  
15:51 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: No no!!! fjslkdfjdfjsllasdkjf I’m not joking this time!! I knocked on their door and Ermal yellde that they are making out!!! .  
15:52 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: yelled*  
15:53 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: I--  
15:54 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: they sure sounded as if they’re making out 💦  
15:55 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]: {right_in_front_of_my_salad.gif}  
15:56 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: lord finally  
16:00 Marco @ [omg theyr dormmates]: ...and they were room mates  
16:00 Vige @ [omg theyr dormmates]: oh my god they were room mates 😱  
16:00 Ra @ [omg theyr dormmates]:OMG THEY WERE ROOM MATES!  
16:00 Dino @ [omg theyr dormmates]: omg they were roommates  
16:02 Claudio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: lmaoooo  
16:03 Dino @ [omg theyr dormmates]: the gc name's prophecy finally came true amen 🙏🏻

 

 

16:32 Ermal @ [omg theyr dormmates]: I hate every single one of u nosy mfs 😤

 

Ermal has left [omg theyr dormmates]

 

16:33 Fabrizio @ [omg theyr dormmates]: dw ill get him back im rather good with riddles 😉

**Author's Note:**

> hewwo !! i actuall wrote this weeks ago but look, considering what went down last night it felt fitting to post it!  
> this is was also inspired by an anecdote of my friend Franci! 
> 
> pls, comment <3 grazie


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